#033 - Paid In Full: The Ultimate Guide To Salary & Offer Negotiation

Did you know the word "negotiation" originated in the early 15th century?

It’s derived from two Latin terms: negare otium.

This translates directly to ‘deny leisure’ - fantastic - and the actual meaning was ‘business.”

(All sorts to unpack there.)

By the late 1570s, ‘negotiation’ had evolved to mean ‘to communicate in search of mutual agreement.’

(That’s a bit nicer, isn’t it?)

And humans - ‘homo sapiens’ at least - were supposedly negotiating as much as 200,000 years ago, presumably about who went lion-hunting and who got to stay in bed and watch TikToks.

Anyway.  

Some good news: you might not even have to negotiate.

(You may now breathe a sigh of relief.)

More than once - and this will be the same for every recruiter out there - I’ve been able to offer a candidate a salary and package that’s way above their initial expectations.

I wish that were the case every time. Alas, it is not. And that’s why we’re here, isn’t it?

But look, no need to worry. You don’t have to be Henry Kissinger. And you don’t need to be adversarial (thank you, Chris Voss). All you need to be is empathetic, measured, and gently firm.

And remember: recruiters are used to candidates negotiating. We. Are. So. Used. To. It.

If someone negotiates, it’s not going to throw us off. If anything, we’re expecting it. And hey, we might even be a bit nervous too. Some people on LinkedIn might have you believe otherwise but recruiters are, indeed, human. Let that ease your anxiety a little bit.

Okay.

Let’s be like my puppy with that weird patch of dirt outside our flat and dig in:

1. Salary and offer negotiation starts from day 1

2. Confirm the salary & package throughout the interview process

3. The market (and the company) sets the rate

4. Don’t to accept on the spot

5. Get everything in writing

6. Negotiate!

7. You have the most leverage after you’ve been offered the role

8. Be okay with walking away

1. Salary and offer negotiation starts from day 1

You need to get an idea of the salary range as soon as possible - preferably before the first call you have with the recruiter.

If that’s not possible then getting those details on that first call is fine. (Some companies prohibit any salary-related talk before that first call. Not ideal but it’s true.)

A recruiter certainly shouldn’t be asking about your current salary. Why? It’s not relevant. The salary for this role is the salary for this role. It doesn’t matter what you’re making in your current or were making in your previous role and that means you don’t have to volunteer that information.

In fact, please don’t. Because, again, it’s not relevant and could maybe put you at a disadvantage when negotiating.

What the recruiter should be doing is either giving you a salary range or asking what your salary expectations are. This is how we make sure everyone is like Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, and Saturn will be at some point in the 2040s: aligned. 

If they ask you what you’re looking for, you can say something like this:

“Based on my research, my skills, and my experience, I’m looking for between [x] and [x]. I’d also need to know about any bonuses and benefits so I can make a properly informed decision. Can you tell me the range for this role? And can we discuss the bonuses and benefits too, please?”

As is written above, ask about bonuses and benefits as well. It pays - perhaps literally - to have an idea of what your full package might look like.

(Important note: us recruiters want you to get paid. We want you to get the most amount possible and any good recruiter will advocate for exactly that - provided we get treated with respect, of course.)

2. Confirm the salary and package throughout the interview process

It’s the best idea since sliced bread to confirm the salary and package every time you move forward in the interview process.

Why do this? One, over-communication is better than under-communication. Two, it holds the company accountable. Three, maybe it’ll just make you feel better rather than being worried you haven’t discussed money since your first chat with the recruiter and now you’re nervously wondering, “I hope the salary and package haven’t changed.”

If the hiring manager wants to put you through to the next stage, confirm the salary and package again with the recruiter. Same with the next interview. And any other interviews. And then, when the final interview comes, confirm before and after.

Also, if your salary and package expectations change - you’re in another process that’s offering you more money, for example - that’s okay. Again, us recruiters are used to it.

But.

Please tell us. If you’re in another process and you’ve been offered a better salary and package, let us know as soon as you hear. A good recruiter will do their best to see if their company can match or even exceed that.

(Important note: If you’re going to tell us you’ve received a better offer from another company, make sure that’s actually true. You don’t want to make an offer up and then have the first company withdraw your offer and offer someone else because they thought they couldn’t match your made-up offer. It happens, so be careful.)

(I said “offer” way too much there.)

3. The market (and the company) sets the rate

Even if you were Henry Kissinger, there would be a limit to your negotiating powers.

Not only does the market set the rate, but companies have their own salary ‘bandings.’ There will be a maximum package they can offer someone and that will be based on the market, the geography, and the level of the role (junior, manager, director, VP, etc).

You might be able to negotiate your way to the very top end of that range - and I encourage you to try - but if a good recruiter tells you there’s nothing more the company can do, I suggest you believe them.

(Important note: some companies (in)famously pay well above the market rate. I’m not going to tell you to turn down an offer like that, but I will say if and when it comes time to look for another job outside the company, don’t be surprised if you can’t get more money - especially if it’s a lateral move.)

4. Don’t accept on the spot

Even though you know that searching for a job means you’re ultimately going to leave your current job and get a new one, when you actually get an offer it’s still as big a deal as having many leather-bound books and an apartment that smells of rich mahogany.

Because all of a sudden, it’s real.

The leaving, the uncertainty, the newness, the emotions, the money. It’s all right there.

So, you could say something like this:

“Thanks so much! That’s amazing. I’m really happy you want to offer me. When do you need a decision?”

Some recruiters might want you to verbally accept before they get any official paperwork over to you - it’s probably company policy - and if that’s the case, you can say something like this:

“I’m sure if the offer is aligned with what we’ve been discussing then I’d accept. I don’t see why I wouldn’t! Can I get everything in writing first before I officially make the decision?”

Speaking of which…

5. Get everything in writing

When should you officially accept an offer?

Only when you’ve received an official contract, gone over everything in said contract with a fine-toothed comb, and asked all the questions you need to ask.

If you want to have another quick call with the hiring manager or recruiter to go over your questions, please ask. At the very least, email them over.

Make sure you know what you’re agreeing to. And if a contract hasn’t been signed by both parties, nothing has been agreed to.

6. Negotiate!

Let’s say, for whatever reason, you haven’t been offered what you want and you aren’t yet comfortable accepting.

Let the fun begin.

The most important thing to do here is to appeal to the company and hiring manager’s self-interest.

Here’s what I mean: if you wanted to buy a house and you made an offer and the current owner came back and said, “The thing is, my partner and I were really hoping to go on a Caribbean cruise this year and so we really need you to bump the offer by 10,000. How about it?”

Does that inspire you to offer more money? I very much doubt it. At best, you’d probably wonder why they just told you that. At worst, it would piss you off.

Same thing when you’re negotiating. I’m not saying you’ll get an offer revoked for negotiating - I think this has only happened once in my whole career and that was an exceptional case (they were very rude and demanding) - but I’m saying that if you only talk about what you want, your negotiation will be about as effective as literally anybody trying to guard Caitlin Clark.

(Not very.)

So.

Instead of saying you need the money because you want to buy a bigger house and book an all-inclusive holiday to the Maldives next year, you might want to say something like this:

“Thanks for the offer. I really appreciate it.

“In the interview process, it was mentioned the most important problems to solve in this role were [x] and [x]. My skills and experience show I can do that - and do it quickly, efficiently, and at a high level - and I believe I got that across in my interviews, hence your offer.

“You mentioned the top of the range was [x]. Can we find a way to get to that number? If we can, I’ll be thrilled to accept. Again, thanks for the offer, thanks for being a great support in this recruitment process, and I really would love to join [company].”

You still might not get exactly what you’re asking for but I’ve seen this response - via phone or email - get more than a few people a nice bump in salary.

Like pineapple on pizza, it’s 100% worth a try.

And hey, perhaps they really can’t do anything on salary right now. Fine. Here are some other things that might be negotiable:

• Sign-on bonus

• Salary increase in 6 months

• Annual bonus increase

• Shares / equity

• Holiday days

• Working hours or days (4 days a week instead of 5, maybe)

• Remote / hybrid working

• Any other benefits (personal development budget, health & wellbeing budget, private healthcare, travel costs, etc)

• (Ask what else is negotiable!)

When it comes to the above, you might have more luck with a startup than a big, established corporation. Why? A startup probably has less processes and more flexibility.

If you’re applying to a role at a big corporation, the salary, sign-on bonus, and equity/shares might be negotiable but everything else might be set in stone.

This doesn’t mean you can’t try negotiating them, of course, but if a recruiter tells you they’re like the handprints on the Hollywood Walk of Fame - set in stone - and there’s nothing the company can do, I suggest you believe them. 

Finally, you could ask a trusted friend if they’ve ever negotiated an offer and, if so, how they did it. You can probably also find examples on Reddit and other online communities but be careful. I don’t know if you know this, but anyone can just post anything on the internet.

7. You have the most leverage when you’ve been offered the role

A company doesn’t want to go through the whole recruitment process again. Believe me. Not only is it deflating, it’s a drain on resources - namely people’s time and energy.

If you’re ever feeling too afraid to negotiate, remember that. 

8. Be okay with walking away

Yes, I know. But it’s a cliché for a reason.

Hopefully it won’t come to this because you and the recruiter have been discussing the salary & package throughout the interview.

But.

It’s not up to the recruiter what you end up getting offered. That decision lies with the hiring manager.

A recruiter can - and will - do their best to get you the most amount of money possible, but the hiring manager might think your skills, experience, and interview performance warrant offering you on the lower end of the range.

You don’t want to take an offer you don’t truly want to take. (Obviously.) That’s probably only going to lead to resentment and unhappiness, a combination akin to toothpaste and orange juice.

If you’ve negotiated and the numbers still aren’t where you want or need them to be, it might be time to do what Forrest Gump did but only if you watched the film in slow motion: walk away.

(Important note: the above depends on one’s financial circumstances. (Just wanted to say “one’s”.) Maybe you just need some money coming in. If so, then feel free to take whatever is offered - but keep your job search going.)